Well, today, I’d like to focus your attention on three popular sex positions and, in particular, the advantages and disadvantages of each one. We will be considering the missionary position, the “man-standing-up-woman-lying-down” position and the cowgirl (“woman on top”) position.
1/ MISSIONARY POSITION
This is the traditional position for sex where, as I’m sure you know, the man lies down on top of a prone woman for intercourse.
This is the easiest sex position to get into, requires little energy to get started and is great for sudden, spontaneous, unplanned sex. It is generally easy for the man to just roll over on top of the woman and their genitals are right opposite each other. This position lends itself to great intimacy because the two lovers can hug each other and look into each others’ eyes (if they are roughly the same height). Intercourse feels very exciting for the man, and the woman gets to receive some significant thrusting and a “whole body” experience. It is usually fairly quiet and can be done secretly if there is a danger of being discovered by other people in the house.
This position has a reputation for being the “boring, married-people type of sex”, since it tends to lend itself to passionless “quickies” and can be repeated every time a couple have sex. It is often resorted to in order to avoid being discovered by curious kids and other people who might interrupt the session. The high levels of stimulation often cause the man to ejaculate quickly in less than 2-3 minutes, creating a bad habit for his body and a boring experience for the woman, whose body has hardly begun to respond to the sex before it’s all over. It is challenging for the man to create an orgasm for his woman unless he spends a LOT of time in foreplay beforehand and even then, lengthening the time having intercourse is quite difficult.
2/ Man standing up, woman lying down
This is the position where the woman lies down with her hips aligned with the edge of the bed, while the man stands up at the edge of the bed for intercourse.
The main advantage of this position from the man’s point of view is the fact that it dramatically lengthens the amount of time he can have intercourse with the woman – anything up to 10-20 minutes or more can be achieved. Having sex standing up makes it much harder for his body to be stimulated to orgasm, so he has to thrust for a longer time to achieve it. He can also see the woman’s body much better and can use his hands to touch her breasts and upper body, which allows the woman to receive stimulation in two different ways at the same time. The woman usually holds her legs wide open by placing her hands behind her knees. He can also watch his penis slide in and out of her, the sight of which is a major turn-on. He can also thrust much deeper, so he can reach the woman’s A-spot, which can give the woman “cervical” orgasms.
Having sex comfortably while standing up requires that the bed be at the same height as the man’s hips. Usually it isn’t – it’s lower. This means that the man has to bend at the knees to be able to have intercourse with the woman. This is tiring on the man’s legs because he has to thrust for a long time, plus there is the issue of his bent knees meaning that his legs are not flush with the edge of the bed. This can be resolved by pulling the woman’s hips off the bed, so that the small of her back is on the edge of it, but this requires that the woman change the position of her legs by folding them up against her chest in order to counteract the centre of gravity, so her whole body doesn’t slide off the bed – in which case, she will end up sitting on the floor with her legs wide open. Folding her legs up against her chest means that the man is no longer able to access her breasts and upper body, so that avenue of stimulation is closed off. Inexperienced women may not realise that they need to hold their legs open with their hands behind their knees and so they will dangle their legs off the end of the bed past the man’s body, which can be uncomfortable. There is a greater risk of injury to the woman’s vaginal tissues from heavy thrusting, since the man can go deeper.
3/ Cowgirl Position
This is the position where the woman gets on top of a prone man and straddles his hips for intercourse.
This position is a winner in many ways – it feels awesome to the woman and is extremely exciting for the man. The main benefit is for the woman – she can control everything that is going on and do exactly what she needs to do to achieve an orgasm without relying on the man’s expertise and experience. She can do exactly what feels good to HER, whether or not he knows how to do that or not. She can go deep or shallow, fast or slow, in and out, up and down, she can rock back and forth, grind her pelvis against his pubic bone for clitoral stimulation, lean backwards, lean forwards, lean left and right, sit facing the man, do “reverse cowgirl”, sit on the left of his body, sit on the right, go around and around like she’s sitting on a swivel chair and all kinds of stuff! For the man, he gets to watch his woman having the time of her life doing whatever she wants to get the maximum pleasure she can out of his body, which is a major turn-on for him and, secretly, giving his woman a totally mind-blowing time is what every man wants, and this is the lazy way to achieve it without him having to learn any “skills”. However, learn he will, since watching her is highly educational and he will find out exactly what turns her on without having to “try everything and watch her carefully to see what happens”, which is the usual method of approach for us guys. She can teach her man a lot in a short time and he can remember it all for the next time he’s in control. In the meantime, he can lay back and enjoy the ride as much as her because his penis gets lots of stimulation. He can also use his hands to stimulate her breasts and upper body, run his fingers through her hair, tilt her head back and many other things. In addition, there is the reversal of dominance – putting the woman in control of the sex is liberating for her and wildly exciting for him, as he discovers just how much of a wild girl his woman really is.
This position is HIGH ENERGY for both partners. That could also be a plus, but for the woman, her legs need to be really strong to cope with all the up and down movement, which needs to go on more or less nonstop for at least 20 minutes for her to achieve an orgasm. It is a major cardiovascular exercise and feat of physical endurance. There will be sweat and slippery bodies and a lot of heavy breathing and noise. It is quite stimulating for the man and there is the risk of early ejaculation, ending it all rather quickly before he’s had a chance to learn anything or see things really heat up, although women naturally tend to grind more than slide up and down, which can delay his orgasm quite well. His penis needs to be HARD for this – he needs a strong erection and it needs to last a long time. There is also a risk of damage to the penis if the girl is really forceful in dropping her whole upper body weight on top of it and she misses her vagina (ouch!) There can be bending of the penis in this case, which is quite a serious injury (often requiring hospitalization!) Also, achieving entry of the penis into the vagina at the beginning can be a little difficult, since the man’s penis is pointing upwards and is flat against his body, so either he has to move his penis to a 90-degree position to his body (the usual way) or else she has to lean forward quite a bit for him to put it inside her. There is the also the risk of the noise being detected by other people around, so choose a quiet time for this, when there are not many people around!
So these are the advantages and disadvantages of these three sex positions. If you are considering spicing up your sex life with some new positions, I hope this information helps you to choose the one you want, so that both of you can achieve an exciting and amazing sex life together!